Exploring Sensations in our body from a therapist in Madison

In 2021 I took a training called Sensorimotor Psychotherapy: Level 1 Trauma themes. It was a 6 month training. It changed a lot for me; my awareness of my own body, how I work with my clients, and how I approach therapy. I knew I needed another approach to work within the body. So often in my sessions I would hear from clients that they knew something logically but they just weren’t sure why they didn’t believe it. It dawned on me that believing it was connected to feeling it, embodying it and mind and body being in congruence around it. Sensorimotor Psychotherapy is a bottom up approach. While the resources used in sensorimotor psychotherapy- breathing, centering, grounding are similar to other approaches the way that I work with them is a little different. I also work with posture and movement.

One thing that really stood out for me was differentiating feelings from sensations. You might have been taught about feelings growing up, but most of you were probably not made aware of sensations. Because this is new to most of you, it was to me, I have included a list of common sensations that might help you bring some more awareness into our bodies.

Achy, airy, bloated, blocked, breathless, bubbly, burning, buzzy, chills, churning, clammy, clenched, congested, constricted, cool, cold, damp, dense, dizzy, dull, electric, empty, energized, faint, flaccid, flushed, fluid, fluttery, floaty, fuzzy, goosebumps, heavy, hot, itchy, jerky, jumbly, knotted, light, moist, nauseaous, numb, paralyzed, pins and needles, prickly, puffy, quaking, quivery, radiating, sharp, shivery, shuddering, sore, stiff, suffocating, sweaty, tense, think, tight, tickley, tingly, trembling, twitchy, vibrating, warm, week and wobbly. (Ogden, P. & Fisher, J.,Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, Interventions for Trauma and Attachment)

I work a lot with anxiety. So an example of what someone may be experiencing with anxiety could look like the following. If a client comes in with anxiety they may describe feeling anxious, or nervous. Those are feelings and that is really good awareness. I might ask what sensations go with that anxiety. In general many people do not know or haven’t thought about it. So we take it a step further and I would note that sometimes when I feel anxious my heart starts racing, I may notice a warmth or sweatiness, my stomach might feel like butterflies, fluttering or a knot, sometimes my shoulders feel tight or tense. Once we notice these sensations we can work with them.

What sensations do you notice in your body?

To learn more about working with sensations in the body, contact me (therapist Madison) julie@kullcounselingmadison.com.

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness 2022

“I carry your heart with me, I am never without it.” - E.E. Cummings

October is Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness Month. October 15th is Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness day. So many emotions come up this time of year. Some of you may be apprehensive every year as fall approaches- you may notice feeling more irritable and having less capacity for other things. For some of you this may be a time of peace-peace in remembering your loved one and reconnection. For others this may bring up fear or anxiety. For others this may be a time of deep sadness and grief. However you are feeling about this month or day is okay. For those of you looking for a way to engage with others that have experienced a pregnancy or infant loss here are some options.

October

1st: Harley’s Hustle in person or virtual. Monroe, WI

2nd: Sunday, October 2nd, Forever in our Hearts Remembrance Day. Madison, WI

6th: Free virtual miscarriage support group October 6th. Madison, WI hosted by Julie Kull, LCSW (therapist Madison).

15th: 7 p.m. your local time on October 15th, Wave of light. Light a candle at 7 p.m. to honor your baby. Nationally

20th: October 20th, 7:30 p.m. Bereaved Parents of Madison virtual support group. Madison, WI

To learn more about the miscarriage support group click here.

Meditation for miscarriage, pregnancy after loss and new moms

I remember trying to meditate for the first time. I made every excuse in the book to avoid it. I convinced myself that I did not have time, convinced myself that it wasn’t a good use of my time, that I wasn’t doing it right so what was the point. It took YEARS until I developed a regular practice and it is still a work in progress.

Meditation has so many unbelievable benefits. According to Positive Psychology.com , meditation can reduce physical, mental and emotional disturbances. This can include anxiety, depression, pain, blood pressure, stress, migraines, IBS, ect. Meditation can be so effective.

So if it is so great, why isn’t everyone doing it? What I hear often is that it is hard, you may think you are doing it wrong and if you are doing it wrong what is the point? Other reasons can include you may feel uncomfortable, overwhelmed or don’t want to feel anything.

All of the reasons are valid. I like to invite my clients to start small. Try to take one minute everyday where you just try to tune into your body and breath and go from there. Many of you may find it is easier to do when you have someone guiding you. I certainly do! There are meditations everywhere it seems but finding one that resonates with you is important.

Recently I have created some meditations with you in mind. My library is building slowly but I currently have meditations for miscarriage, pregnancy after loss and motherhood. I will be adding more soon. If you are looking for a specific meditation that is a fit for you please- DM me, reply to this newsletter and let me know what you are looking for and I will do my best to make that available to you.

Interested in learning more about the meditations from a therapist Madison? Click here.

Happy Meditating!

Anxiety therapist Madison: Still coping with Covid-19 and anxiety

This is an article that was modified from another article that I wrote in 2020 about anxiety during covid.

It is 2022. We are still dealing with Covid-19. If you are noticing the weight of it hitting you again you are not alone. We are at the two year mark, going on year 3. Your anxiety may be on the rise again as we head into another year. Here are some coping tips I offered in 2020 which are still applicable now. I have added in a few additional ones.

1. Exercise- exercise is important for physical and mental health. If you have an anxiety disorder exercise plays an essential role in managing anxiety. Exercise not only releases serotonin and endorphins to improve your mood but also can reduce activation in the amygdala which is the area of the brain that sends a distress signal to activate our fight, flight, freeze response. https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/understanding-the-stress-response

2. Get outside- Time in the outdoors can be restorative. Having deficient levels of vitamin D can also be linked to depression and anxiety. https://www.unitypoint.org/livewell/article.aspx?id=ca7f4766-8ba8-43a2-bbe7-0ef9efab5c6d

3. Meditate- Meditation can improve focus, decrease anxiety, and help with emotion regulation among other benefits.

4. Keep a routine- our bodies thrive on routines. Routines can improve productivity, setting expectations and having some control.

5. Sleep- REM sleep can also play a role in decreasing activation in the amygdala. Setting up a sleep routine can signal to our body when it is time to go to sleep.

6. Social Support- these are hard times. While you many be social distancing from friends you do not need to isolate. Reaching out to friends can provide a sense of normalcy and a sense of belonging.

7. Manage your screen time- Between work, school and socializing online many of your are getting more screen time than you ever have before. Screen time can impact anxiety, sleep and overall well-being.

8. Focus on what you have control of- unfortunately with Covid-19 it may feel like there are many things that are out of your control. Focusing on these can lead to increased anxiety. Instead try focusing on what things are within your control. Make a plan for the things that are in your control, and let go of the things that are out of your control.

9. Stay present- Ask yourself what do I know in this moment instead of the what ifs.

10. Attitude of Gratitude- in the midst of all this chaos there is a lot to be grateful for. What do you feel grateful for? Write it down, say it out loud. Surround yourself with positive messages.

11. Be mindful when reading the news. Is it serving you? Are you finding out anything new? What does knowing this information do for you? How are you feeling when you read the news? Do you need a break?

12. It is okay if your comfort level changes- again, and again and again. Listen to your needs.

13. Get dressed for your day. Even if you are working from home. Even if you don’t have any meetings.

14. Weigh your risks. Everything has a risk when it comes to your physical and mental health. Calculate your risks versus what is important to you and then make your decision on what you are comfortable with.

15. Acceptance- you are living in a global pandemic. If you are having anxiety right now- accept that it is there. Acknowledge it, name it, allow yourself to notice how it feels- notice what sensations go with that feeling and allow them to be there.

    For more information on coping with anxiety during the pandemic or to set up a free 15-minute consultation email julie@kullcounselingmadison.com or 608.239.4807 to work with a therapist Madison.

The emotional toll of a Missed Miscarriage

Having a miscarriage can be devastating. You may know signs and symptoms to look for  when your body may be starting the process of miscarriage and look for those throughout the first trimester. However, you may not know  that you can suffer a loss, but the body may not show signs of a miscarriage. This is referred to as a missed miscarriage.

Having a missed miscarriage can add an extra layer to the grief and trauma around early pregnancy loss. According to www.progny.com, “A missed miscarriage, also known as a missed abortion or a silent miscarriage, occurs when a fetus is no longer alive, but the body does not recognize the pregnancy loss or expel the pregnancy tissue. As a result, the placenta may continue to release hormones, so you may continue to experience signs of pregnancy.” A missed miscarriage can be devastating when there has not been any symptoms, and often, these symptoms may be typical of a healthy pregnancy - i.e., fatigue, nausea, etc. For most of you, you will find out about missed miscarriages when you go into your doctor’s office for your first appointment. One of the happiest days of your life (when you get to see your baby for the first time) can quickly turn to one of your saddest (finding out your baby is no longer alive).

For many carrying partners this can feel like your body has failed you, twice. Once, that your body was not able to carry a baby to term, and twice, because if your pregnancy was to end in a miscarriage why did your body not do this naturally? This can lead to a strong mistrust in your body that may lead to abuse or neglect of yourself. This also can present in a subsequent pregnancy causing anxiety and depression or ptsd. It can feel like your body is not a safe place for a healthy pregnancy after a missed miscarriage.

Having a missed miscarriage also leads you to what can be a difficult and painful decision of deciding how to manage the miscarriage process. While some people will wait to see if their body can complete the miscarriage on its own, most doctors will encourage you to schedule an intervention to manage the miscarriage process for health concerns.

After a decision has been made it can still be weeks to months to complete the process and symptoms of pregnancy may linger for months after that.

It is common to feel many different things, some common ones being shock, anger, denial, grief, shame, jealousy. You may feel a loss of control. It can be helpful to get connected to support during a missed miscarriage whether that is a support group, or a therapist that can help you talk through your decision, feelings and support you through the process and after a loss. Having a miscarriage can be isolating, finding support can make a huge difference.

Finding ways to be present in your body can be an important part of your process. Whether this is through grounding, centering, breathe work or exercise, movement or dance, it is important to be in your body and find healthy ways to reconnect with your body.

For more resources on miscarriage and to learn about the miscarriage support group with a therapist Madison, sign up for my monthly newsletter here. https://www.kullcounselingmadison.com/

Coping with Anxiety and Covid-19

In the last few weeks it may feel that your world has been turned upside down. Many of you may be quarantined, social distancing, staying at home or safer at home. In this time of uncertainty, Covid-19, many of you may be feeling an increase of anxiety. Here are some tips for managing anxiety during the pandemic.

1. Exercise- exercise is important for physical and mental health. If you have an anxiety disorder exercise plays an essential role in managing anxiety. Exercise not only releases serotonin and endorphins to improve your mood but also can reduce activation in the amygdala which is the area of the brain that sends a distress signal to activate our fight, flight, freeze response. https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/understanding-the-stress-response

2. Get outside- Time in the outdoors can be restorative. Having deficient levels of vitamin D can also be linked to depression and anxiety. https://www.unitypoint.org/livewell/article.aspx?id=ca7f4766-8ba8-43a2-bbe7-0ef9efab5c6d

3. Meditate- Meditation can improve focus, decrease anxiety, and help with emotion regulation among other benefits.

4. Keep a routine- our bodies thrive on routines. Routines can improve productivity, setting expectations and having some control.

5. Sleep- REM sleep can also play a role in decreasing activation in the amygdala. Setting up a sleep routine can signal to our body when it is time to go to sleep.

6. Social Support- these are hard times. While you many be social distancing from friends you do not need to isolate. Reaching out to friends can provide a sense of normalcy and a sense of belonging.

7. Manage your screen time- Between work, school and socializing online many of your are getting more screen time than you ever have before. Screen time can impact anxiety, sleep and overall well-being.

8. Focus on what you have control of- unfortunately with Covid-19 it may feel like there are many things that are out of your control. Focusing on these can lead to increased anxiety. Instead try focusing on what things are within your control. Make a plan for the things that are in your control, and let go of the things that are out of your control.

9. Stay present- Ask yourself what do I know in this moment instead of the what ifs.

10. Attitude of Gratitude- in the midst of all this chaos there is a lot to be grateful for. What do you feel grateful for? Write it down, say it out loud. Surround yourself with positive messages.

    For more information on coping with anxiety during the pandemic or to set up a free 15-minute consultation email julie@kullcounselingmadison.com or 608.239.4807.

Setting an intention for 2020

Last year I wrote this article and it has been updated for 2020. This year I set not only an intention for the year but also looking forward to a new decade.

Last year’s intention was growth. I pushed myself personally and professionally to do things that made me really uncomfortable and that helped me grow. Setting an intention can help you to focus not only on what you want out of the year but also help to hold you accountable. I challenge you to post your intention somewhere that you can see it this year or maybe even somewhere that others can see it too!

Only a few more days and 2019 will be at a close. For many people this is a welcome change. The start of a new year signals beginnings, and provides an opportunity for change and growth. What do we want from this new year? How will it be different than last year? What do we wish was different in our life? What needs to change this year for us? While I am not big on New Year’s resolutions, I do like setting intentions and working to achieve goals.

According to Mind Body Green, “Intentions are the fuel to manifesting your goals and visions.” There are many different ways to set an intention, but this year I challenge you to set a one-word intention. Think of one word that will help guide you in the next year to get you closer to your goals or visions. When we create a long list of goals or resolutions, it can be difficult to stick with. Focusing on one word can provide focus on your intention and more obtainable goals.

My intention this year is to live intentionally.

This means paying attention to what I give and take from my environment.

Paying attention to how I am giving and taking energy from others.

Focusing on the present.

Ways to use Intentions:

• Create a mantra around it that you can repeat to yourself or just say the word.

• Post the word somewhere you can see it - on your bathroom mirror, your daily planner or set your phone screen with a picture of your intention.

• Journal about how your intention is being incorporated into your life.

• Meditate on this word.

• Share your word, ask friends close to you to set an intention and discuss how this word is showing up in your life.

• Create a collage with your intention in the middle and see what develops.

What will your intention be this year?

To learn more about setting intentions and growth check out www.kullcounselingmadison.com

When pregnancy after a loss doesn't feel like a rainbow

You've experienced a perinatal loss and now you are pregnant again. The response of some people may be "I am so excited" or "I feel so lucky to be pregnant after a loss" but what if that isn't your response?  What if your response sounds more like "I am terrified or nervous" or "what if it happens again?". 

A rainbow baby is defined as a baby that is born after a miscarriage or stillbirth. In life a rainbow appears after a storm. The storm is perinatal loss and the rainbow is your beautiful baby that has emerged from the darkness (Urban Dictonary). While being able to get pregnant after a loss can be a relief and joy, it can also bring about a mixture of emotions.

Here are some common emotions that you may experience during a rainbow pregnancy:

Anxiety- Many couples experience intense anxiety during a pregnancy with a rainbow baby. After a loss your sense of security is gone. You may worry constantly about the health of your pregnancy. Women can have difficult times attaching to their pregnancies depending on physical symptoms for reassurance or worrying at the absence of them. You may feel like you will jinx the pregnancy if you start to plan for a baby; telling family and friends you are pregnant, buying items to bring the baby home, picking out names or even just getting excited about the pregnancy. Simple check-ups at the doctors office can turn into anxiety and nightmares. Even every day tasks can seem daunting as you worry about how it will effect the well being of your pregnancy.

Depression- You may feel intense feelings of sadness about your loss. You may have guilt about feeling happy or sad. Some couples wait until they have processed their loss before they start trying again, while others may start trying right away. Whether or not you waited to start trying again, getting pregnant again can bring such a sense of relief but it can also bring up feelings of sadness that you may have thought were gone. 

Grief- While you might have felt that you processed your grief from your loss, a pregnancy after a loss may bring up some of your grief again. It can feel like this pregnancy is supposed to replace your loss. You may struggle with honoring the child you lost while also honoring the child you are pregnant with. It may be an internal struggle to sit with your feelings of grief while also being happy for the new life inside of you.

If you are feeling mixed emotions about being pregnant again, you are not alone. How you feel about your pregnancy may change each day if not each hour. Anxiety, Depression and Grief are common emotions but so are Happiness, Relief and Hope. 

If you experiencing intense emotions during your rainbow pregnancy you are not alone. For counseling services please contact Kull Counseling, LLC at 608.239.4807 or email julie@kullcounselingmadison.com. For information on support groups please contact Bereaved Parents of Madison,

How to support someone suffering from anxiety

Anxiety is our body's natural response to a perceived threat. We all experience anxiety now and again when dealing with the stressors of life. However, many people experience such severe anxiety that it interferes with daily life and makes it extremely difficult to perform at work, maintain relationships; or start/finish tasks.   

The following highlights some common signs of anxiety and some questions to ask yourself to determine if your friend, family or loved one may be exhibiting those signs.

Common signs and questions to ask yourself to determine if a loved one has anxiety

1. Worry - Do they worry a lot? Do they worry about things they have little control over? Are they uncomfortable in situations that they cannot control?

2. Irritability - Do they feel keyed up, sometimes on edge?

3. Stress - Do they have a hard time feeling calm or an inability to relax?

4. Rumination - Do they have a hard time letting go of things- ruminating on something that was said or done a while after the incident occurred.

5. Negative thinking - Does this person have a lot of negative self talk or view of the world?

If these symptoms sound familiar, your loved one might be suffering from anxiety. The good news is you can help! Below are several Important tips to being a helpful and supportive ally, including several things to avoid when trying to support someone with anxiety:

1. Be a support person. Let this person talk to you about their feelings and emotions. Try not to judge what they are saying. 

2. Learn about about anxiety. The more you know the more you can be supportive. If you find anxiety frustrating, imagine how this person might feel. Think about a time when you felt anxious and how that felt. Imagine feeling that way every day or for prolonged periods of time.

3. Encourage the positives. Suggest positive coping skills such as: regular exercise, meditation, mindfulness, balanced nutrition, avoidance of caffeine and alcohol. Reinforce rational thinking and  help them try to avoid thoughts that are irrational.

Are you worried you may say the wrong thing? To help guide your conversation below are some hurtful phrases along with some more encouraging ones.

Hurtful-

"You should try to relax." "Don't worry about it." "Please try to calm down."

Helpful-

"How can I help?" "I am here to talk if you need someone." "I noticed that you did x even though you were really worried about it, I am proud of you."

Lastly, don’t be afraid to reach out because you won’t say the ‘right” thing. By talking to someone who is struggling with anxiety, you are already taking an important first step in making them feel heard, supported, and understood.

If someone you love is suffering from anxiety and needs help please contact Kull Counseling, LLC at 608.239.4807 or julie@kullcounselingmadison.com.